There's now just over 24 hours til check in time!! Yes, it is tomorrow that I fly off to Cyprus! I'm very excited, my suitcase is packed, and all is good!

My suitcase is very heavy - but more than half of it is filled with presents for my family in Cyprus! So, it's really not my fault that it's so full & heavy...

I'm still trying to improve my Turkish...I'm not doing too well, but in August, being the fool that I am, I made a bet with my uncle that by the time I went back - ie tomorrow!!! - I'd be able to talk in Turkish. This bet is VERY important to both of us...It rides on personal pride...So, humiliation for the losing party, especially if it's me!

I will be glad to get away from home, & I don't get back until the 21st, so then it's only a couple of days til I go back to Exeter! Yay!!!

It will be very weird being in Cyprus over Easter - they don't have it! Being Muslim, it's obviously not something they celebrate...So, I'm going to be in school for the whole of Holy Week...Ah well, I suppose that even here, kids don't always get the WHOLE of Holy Week off school any more - I certainly didn't! So, it might not be quite so weird after all.

It will be a bit strange being in school 5 days a week though, & I will have to get up very early; they start school at 8am - & since I'm teaching, I'll have to be there at about 7:30am...The other thing is, I have to get a bus there in the morning...So, lots of early mornings for me, then! It's not all bad though...They may start school early, but they also finish early; my working day finishes at 1pm!! So, I have all of my afternoons to myself, and can explore! Should be great...I'm really looking forward to going to Salamis!

I think though, that the 3 weeks in Cyprus may be 3 weeks without the internet...So, that may also be 3 weeks without blogging...Very sad, I know...But, I will try to access the internet somewhere so that I can blog! Do not despair, my friends!

Well, I've been home for the WHOLE weekend...I'm really holding onto the fact that I only have a week left before I go to Cyprus.

I got back home on Friday, & my parents did take me out to eat, which was quite nice. On Saturday, I escaped by going into the nearest town (10 miles & 40 minutes on a bus), & then in the evening, I worked...I worked in an Off Licence here when I was in Upper 6th, & they're short staffed, so as well as getting me money, working there also gets me out of the house for an evening...

Yesterday was obviously Mothers' Day...Went to Church in the morning; the new priest is nice, he's a bit older than the last one...It was sort of weird going to Church here & there being a priest I'd never met before! It was a bit of the shock to the system in more ways than one...The priest is a lot calmer & quieter than Paul, & Church here has pews & everything...I don't even take my shoes off as soon as I walk in!!!!

We went out for lunch yesterday; we had a Meze meal (a huge selection of Turkish & Greek food that everyone shares. Starters are things like Houmous, Taramasalata, Imambayaldi, Cacik, Black Eyed Bean Salad, deep fried courgettes...Main course is stuff like Pastorma, Beef Stefado, Savory Potatoes, Kofte, Shish Kebab...It's great!

I now officially have approval from the Minister of Education in Northern Cyprus to go into schools there for two weeks, but I'm not allowed to go into my uncle's school!!! The Ministry decided I would be of more use elsewhere, so I have to go into schools totally on my own...Which means getting there on my own every day, etc! I'm a bit nervous about it - my Turkish really isn't that great...But I'm also really VERY excited!

argh! there's only about 48 hours left til I go home!!! i don't really want to go, but i guess i have to. also, there are only 10 days between me getting back & going to cyprus, & i'm there for 3 weeks, so it should be ok. when i get back from cyprus, there's only a week before the start of term, so i might go home for a few days & then come back here a bit early.

i think the doctor now knows how much i dislike going home...i had a bad day on friday, & so my appointment with her was brought forward to yesterday...some of her 1st words were "you really don't like going home, do you?"! she thinks i'm doing really well though, and will survive the 5 weeks away. saw penny yesterday too, & she was great; she knows i don't like going home - she also knows a lot more of the whys than most people; so, we were talking about how i'm going to cope for 5 weeks!

i got up nice & early this morning, but have still done no work on my essays today...oh well...i'll do some later...they both have to be in on friday. the one on plato's 'symposium' is going pretty well...have done lots of reading & everything. i think (& hope) that it should be a good essay; in my other essay for that module, i got 76%, so another good mark would go down very well!!!

i only have 3 exams in june, so you would have thought that they would be on 3 different days, wouldn't you? well, if you thought that, you would be wrong!!! i have a classics one on the 8th of june, in the morning, so that will be 3hrs 45mins with my extra time; i have my theology one on the morning of the 11th of june, which will be 2hrs 30mins; my other classics one is on the afternoon of 11th of june, so another 3hrs 45mins...talk about torture!!! i hate having to sit still at the best of times, but over 6hrs in one day?!!!!!! argh!!

tis the last cathsoc of term tonight, & therefore, my last cathsoc meeting as president! i don't know whether to be slightly sad, or to cheer...both seem rather appropriate!

hmmm; well, i suppose i'd better crack on with these essays...

more from the land of me tomorrow!

Hehe - I'm feeling quite obliged to blog now, as i have paz & joz reading my blog...

i have done some reading of stuff for my classics essays - obscenity is great!! it's soooo funny... also been reading about luuuuurve for my plato essay.

have been a busy lil bunny!

i got my report thing from the disbility resource centre today...it has a gggreat big list of all the things i need - there's looooads of it...

can't believe it's so near the end of term... :(

Well, it's kinda cool to know ppl other than zosh & james read my blog - thanks joz!!!

Today, I have done no work...I went to see Gondaleas - I knew 3 ppl in it! It was quite funny to watch them prancing around the stage!

This evening, though, I do have to do some essay work...But, by the end of this week, I will only have one more essay to do this academic year! How exciting!

This time next week, I will be at home in Warwickshire...Plans have changed slightly, as I remembered it's Mother's Day on the 21st, & my mum & grandma'd quite like me to be there then...So, I'm going home on Friday.

I'll be at home for 8 days, & then I'm off to Cyprus!!! Yay! For a whole 3 weeks! I will b teaching for 2 of them, but it's an exciting place to be teaching!

Well, I'd better go & book my train ticket home, & then get on with my essay...Joy!

1 essay down, 2 to go before the end of term!!! I'm proud of me!!!! Yay!

Well, the time has come for another blog installment.

I have just left about 4 comments on Zosh's blog. She has been very popular - James left about 4 comments too. Bec now has to leave another one, as she has only done 3!! Hers aren't as long as mine & James' either.

Well, yesterday, I had my needs' assessment...I should be getting a new computer, one that reads to me, & has a big screen, so that I can actually see what I'm typing - unlike now!!! & a scanner, & a printer, & an allowance for yellow paper! yay! And that's among other stuff.

I'm slightly worried because my eyesight is getting worse - now, even with my glasses, I don't see too well... Ah well, in abot 6 or 7 weeks, I should have an appointment with a clever eye guy in Oxford!

I went to the Leeds CU when I was in Leeds (surprising that I was in Leeds when I went to the Leeds CU, isn't it?!); it was very CUish. They were all sharing touching little stories about them, so I shared a less touching one about me. It made them all sit down...Ah well...the influence I have!!!

I have an essay deadline tomorrow. I guess I should go & write it.

Well, I said that I'd be a better blogger, and then my internet broke. That left me with no way to check my emails, or blog because only MY computer gets big writing on it.

I now don't know what the DJ has said in about the past 4 days, since while the internet was dead, the webmaster decided to steal my whole inbox, because it was too big. So, I can't get it back until the 13th of March. Not helpful.

tonight was cool, but Karen wasn't there! SHOCKING!!!! It was fun tho!

I'm going to Cyprus in 3 weeks. I'm going from the 29th of March until the 21st of April.

I have lots of letters to write. I'm also very tired today. I might go to bed now.

Well, I've been having some scarily intimidating emails from the dj we booked & cancelled for the CathSoc formal, but I think it's just because he knows he can't win. Now he's turned it into a personal vendetta and is threatening to take ME to court - not CathSoc, but ME!!!!!!! I told him he has little chance of winning if he does. For a start, it will cost him more to try to take me to court than he will get if he wins. I wish he would get it through his thick skull that I am a student, and so live on borrowed money, and have no assets. Any way, if he did try, I could probably get a lot of bad publicity in local press! :-) We'll see how much he likes that one.

I have a cold. I keep sneezing. I also had a really hard counselling session today - used about half a box of tissues! It's not good. Karen has promised that I will be cheered up tonight though!!! :-)

On Friday, I am going to Leeds. Looking forward to it sooooooo much!!!!! It's v exciting! Not coming back til Monday, but think I will have to talk nicely to Virgin, as I have to be somewhere on Monday evening rather than Tuesday, so I will have to get an earlier train back!!! GRR

I have just watched Panorama. I feel the need to write about it. It made me feel sick. Robert Mugabe is an evil man...

In Zimbabwe, there are youth camps; children as young as 11 are there. Mugabe says that they are helping young people to learn skills that they need for work. THEY ARE NOT. The camps train young people as Mugabe's militia. They teach them how to act like him, and how to think like him. They take away the ability of these young people to think for themselves, and function alone.

Boys and girls are raped. It doesn't matter how young they are. Obviously, they do not use any form of contraception...When a girl is raped every night, sooner or later, she will get pregnant. In Zimbabwe, HIV is an issue. Panorama showed a young woman who was so scarred by her experiences in a camp that she cannot talk about them...She has tried to commit suicide...She has a baby because she was raped...She has HIV because she was raped. She KNOWS that she is going to die, leaving her child alone. Her child won't be looked after by social services or anything like that.

As if what I've said isn't bad enough, every day, these young people have to train like soldiers...If they complain, they are beaten...If a girl has been raped so violently that she is bleeding, she still has to do the training...200 pressups, long runs carrying heavy equipment...They are taught how to use guns...They are taught how to kill...They are taught how to hang people with shoe laces...

These children are made to beat and torture people, sometimes their relatives; these young people can never go home...The government knows that all of this is going on...But the government does nothing about it...

Mugabe instructs that all of his opponents must be eliminated...It is these young people who are made to eliminate them. These children are plied with alcohol and drugs; they do not know what they are doing...They are brainwashed...Mugabe is seriously damaging these people...Mugabe is making a generation that will be dangerous to the future...

Today has been OK. Went to Mass...got very worried when at 11:10, i was the only musician! Karen (bless her) was going to play - she cut her nails & everything - but then Mark turned up, so he played instead.

After Mass, 9 of us were going to walk to the Double Locks....Paul, Kris and I walk pretty fast, & we had to keep on slowing down so everyone else could catch up...They were all slow...In the end, we got as far as the Waterfront, and decided that we really wouldn't make it as far as the Double Locks, so we ate there instead...It was good pizza! After that, we walked into town, & I came home...

Kris seems to have really loosened up, and started to join in more recently, which is really nice to see...He appears to be coming out of himself more...

Also had a good chat with Teresa...She's sooo sweet...We discovered that we have very similar tastes in films and books, which is cool!

I think Rachel's idea of starting a prayer group at the Chaplaincy is great...It's really rather exciting!

We also have ALMOST a full CathSoc committee...the only position that still needs filling is Publicity Rep...I think we're going to ask Leo to do that - she's really nice & arty, so it should all be good!

I guess then, that all is well!

Well, I haven't blogged for ages. Ah well, I will be a more diligent blogger in the future.

My blog comes up on a Google search!!!! I was sooooooo excited...Maybe it will come higher up is I mention my eye conditions again...I have persistent diplopia, left amblyopia, & associated microtropia...I know that diplopia is double vision, and amblyopia is my useless eye...I thought microtropia was short sightedness, but it's not; it refers to a squint that is under 5 degrees, short sightedness is myopia. I have that too...My eyes aren't good....But hey!

Did the Enneagram today...It was fun, accurate to a scary extent!!! I am a type One, & a perfectionist! James will probably find a cool link or something, & put it on his blog, so you can find more out about the Enneagram if you want, so go to James' blog!!!

Have worked out why I can't see the pretty colours on my blog; tis because of the visual settings on my computer! It looks plain & boring to me, but to everyone else, it's all pretty!

I got a letter from my LEA - they said that they think I'm entitled to more money, cos of my eyes...I have my Needs Assessment on 8th of March, to establish what it is I need....

Hmmm, think that's enough waffling from me...don't have anything exciting to say...

I'm also intrigued as to which one of mine & Zosia's blogs Mark has decided uses no punctuation, & which one uses too much. I think I've been pretty good with punctuation for a while, & Zosh seems to use enough...So, I'm confused!

Well, I was supposed to have a Greek Philosophy lecture at 3pm yesterday, but I have swollen glands in my throat & a cold...Also, all I've been thinking about since counselling on Tuesday is baked beans - which is making me feel just slightly ill, to put it mildly...So, I didn't go.

I was also supposed to have my Greek Philosophy seminar at 9:00 this morning, but couldn't face getting out of bed that early - didn't sleep too good last night - so didn't go. Eventually got up at about 1:00!!! Lazy me! & for the first time since I got back after Christmas, took 2 'mood brighteners' today.

Well, as some of you have already guessed, and the rest of you will probably guess from my blogs recently, I'm a tad stressed, & finding life all a bit harder than usual - so I'm afraid you're getting depressing blogs...But hey! Never mind...I'll try to be funny sometimes...Can't promise I'll always succeed though...

I also guess that I'm gonna have to work through all of the bad stuff, which has been kept in many neatly labelled boxes inside me for so long so that I can really be me & work away from all of the depression & things...I guess I have to work through it so I can really be the person that I know that I can be and that I deserve to be!

Umm, I think that's probably enough of me for one day...

Well, I'm making up for my slacking in blogging...Haven't blogged since Saturday...& that's aaaaaaaaaaages!!!

Saturday night was fab...Got raaather drunk, but hey - it was fun...We had lots of food, lots of alcohol, & on our way to the Lemmy serenaded Karen with Eagle's Wings!! She opened her window because of it, & everything!!

Sunday was cool too...I did spend the morning feeling quite grotty, but then I realised that it was because I hadn't taken my 'mood brightener', so maybe it wasn't all that bad. Irene cooked on Sunday - rice cookers are great!!!! James is cooking this coming Sunday, which is quite exciting!!! Irene, Mark & Rachel were going to go to Exwick to feed the birds, so Irene said that she'd take me home so I could get my 'mood brightener', which I wasn't going to refuse...But, I decided to go home & get my tablet, & then go to feed birds...It was a GREAT idea!!!! We ended up going to Topsham, going for a walk, & introducing Rachel to Devon Cream Teas - yummy!!! Then, we went to Exwick to feed the birds, but they didn't seem hungry & wouldn't eat our bread! On Sunday night, we had an indoor bbq at my house - it was v cool...We ate lots of food, drank beer (I only had 1) and played drinking games...

Yesterday, I went to see the doctor, & he stole my blood!!!!! He doesn't think there's anything wrong with me, despite the fact I'm really tired all the time at the moment...He may well be right, but I just wanted to get it checked out. Last night, we watched Dream Catcher...My advice is DON'T - it's pants!!! It was scary til they introduced the aliens - they were just unbelievable, so it turned out to be a pants film...I also got pizza last night rather than cooking; it was good pizza!

Today, I had 2 hrs of lectures!!! That's loads for me, counselling, & a lecture and seminar in the evening too...Karen made us all wear name stickers today, which I did find relatively funny!!! We also have some staunch atheists in the RE seminar group, who are thoroughly prepared to leap down the throat of anyone who even dares to suggest that RELIGION should be allowed into a school!!! It could make things more than slightly interesting!!! I think that Karen should provide us with rifles & bullet-proof armour, so that we can protect ourselves in future!!! I mean, I thought I was being outspoken as a second year, but these were first years, who were being even more outspoken!!! It really was quite funny!!! I know that not all of them want to teach RE - one of them has openly admitted she's only in it for the money; another is doing Music, but they don't run a Music seminar, so she ended up in RE...I don't really even have an objection to them - they just make me look quiet - I think it's more amusement than anything else!!!

We watched Dirty Pretty Things today, that was pretty cool...I'm pretty sure I'd watch it again...But, not because it was great - more because it was a bit weird, & I think there's loads of stuff in it that I don't properly understand at the moment...So, I'd need to watch it again to pick up on stuff I missed 1st time round.

Tomorrow, I have one lecture, & CathSoc...I love CathSoc....It'll be great. Still haven't phoned Honiton though...At the moment, I'm feeling a bit overwhelmed by everything I need to do...But I'm sure I'll get there at some point...Just not today, please not today!!!

Well, my phone has STILL not been activated...I'm not hugely amused at that...

I am SOOOOOOOO looking forward to the singlyish, girlyish (not all singles, & not all girls...hence the ish!) night we're having...It should be great!!

Have spent LOTS of money today, but never mind...Went to the Real McCoy, & bought a funky 60s dress...bought my little sister's birthday present - a Disney Princess book....some food for the party this evening...& also went to Lush & bought a face mask & a massage bar (it's v funky, it works a bit like Deep Heat, but it's nicer...it helps my knees & back quite a lot, so don't mind paying for it!)

Didn't get out of bed til 2 this afternoon...Have been physically exhausted recently, though mentally I'm not really that tired...Bit worried about that, but it should all be fine, I'm sure!

Still no real success in finding a blog template - I found 1 & downloaded it, then I realised that it wasn't in HTML form...not impressed at that!!! So, all is still boring til I find one in HTML...oh dear!

I did like James' Valentine's thing!!! It made me giggle - v impressed at all of the thought that must have gone into creating such a lovely image for the love of his life!!!

Hehehe...

I have two things to celebrate today...It's 8 months today since I was at my lowest (may seem weird to celebrate my lowest ebb, but it means that since that day, I've been getting better...so, it might be more logical to celebrate tomorrow - 8 months of getting better)...& also, today it's also definitely 6 months or more since I indulged in activities damaging to myself...So, celebrations all round!!!

Well, I still haven't found a blog template that I like...so, all is still boring, but hey! Never mind. It means u all have to concentrate on my words, cos there's nothing else to distract u!

Today, I got up at 9:45, even though my lecture isn't until 12!!! I was on campus by 10:45, since I had to see the disability person in Classics, to tell her that if she wants to know anything, she needs to contact the DRC, as they have all of the pieces of paper she could ever want about my eyes.

So, now I have 45 minutes until my lecture....I guess that when I'm finished with this, I may go & write a letter to my little brother...He doesn't do enough writing at school, so my mum is making him write a letter to me every week, which is very sweet! This week, he wrote (In pink pen, because apparently, it's my favourite):

To my lovely sister please ring us - Tonight please Lovely i miss you. Sister if you miss your train ill go mad like a demon I read Lord of the rings iv go richard coming. i dont want him to come. i can't wait to see you.

Love from Ben.

XXX

(This is complete with all things like spelling mistakes...Ben is only 7 - bless him...I am a little confused as to why I'm called "sister" throughout the entire letter - I don't think he's forgotten my name?! And no, he's probably not lying or exaggerating when he says he read Lord of the Rings...It's the sort of thing he'd do!)

Any way....I now have a phone!!!! Yay! I can also now use it - even better! I also have a door key, so I don't have to keep climbing in & out of windows! AND, I have a bank card, and therefore money!!! AND, a large print Bible - big enough for me to read easily and everything!!!!

Well, I now only have 40 minutes til my lecture, so I'm off!!!

Have emailed Karen, & sorted all things there, which I'm v glad about. I was pretty upset bout it all, but is all sorted! so smiles!!!

Also noticed Zosh has 2 blog entries for today!

Sorry Zosh

WE WON! WE WON! WE WON!!!!

CathSoc beat the Catenians!!!! 45 to CathSoc 29 to the Catenians! I'm SOOO proud! CathSoc were brilliant!!! I tried so hard to be impartial...for about the 1st 10 questions, & then gave up on that idea, & started showing my absolute support for CathSoc; cheering when they got answers right, & um, well, um, nodding if they mouthed a suggestion of an answer to me before officially saying it...Yeah, I was, um, biased!!!

Very upset though, Zosh said that she would put some of my quotes on her blog too...But she didn't, so I'm gonna put one of them here...I had told the Catenians there wouldn't be questions on Pop music...I then asked one about Travis/Oasis - they protested that it was Pop music, but I amused even myself by quickly retorting with "It's not Pop - it's mainstream Alternative!" I was very proud!!

In the bar afterwards, it was good, but we did keep Karen awake until the early hours of the morning, so I'm feeling really guilty. :-(

Poor Karen...