Well, today I worked as usual. This week I'm thinking I might earn lots of money. I have been working 6 hours a day so far, & that means about £30 a day, which is nice.
 
I want a witch's hat. I had to do a mean wicked witch of the west supervisor talk today. There were 2 girls working on a floor of Lafrowda, and it took them 2 hours to make 6 beds and hoover 6 rooms. How? That's my question. So, I had to kind of tell them to get a move on, and how it really shouldn't have taken them that long, and were they sure that they had been actually working for the full 2 hours?!
 
Don't really know what I'm doing for the rest of today...Maybe some dissertation research, but I'm not sure.
 
Going home for food sounds a good plan. I need some printer paper & some food too, so I may have to go into town later.
 
I have chocolate hobnobs in my room...A whole packet! Mmmm - they're great.

Finally, the Italians have gone! They were annoying, they were everywhere, they were messy, and they were 15. It wasn't good. They finally moved out this morning - hooray! But, that did only leave us with about 4 hours to clean up their mess, and get all of the rooms ready for a conference, which just happens to be the Plymouth, Portsmouth, and Clifton Diocese conference, so we're hoping that as they're all nice Catholic types, they won't be quite so messy as Italian 15 year olds. I think the least that we can hope for is that they don't wet the bed, and that they don't use their showers as toilets (yes, the Italians did do both of these things).
 
I now have enough money to buy my minidisc recorder! Yay!! My LEA do buy it, but I have to buy it and then send them a receipt, and before now, I haven't had enough money (well, overdraft), to buy it, but now I do! So, I can buy it, and then send the receipt to my LEA, and they put the money back into my bank. Pretty cool, methinks!

I'm confused. I'm working. I'm supposedly earning money, but I never actually have any money.
 
Thankfully, I do have a cheque to pay into the bank, and should have another one on Thursday (wages) that between them cover my rent for the month. Always good. That gives me 2 weeks of the month to actually earn some money that won't just get spent straight away. That's a good thing. It means I'll have enough money to eat, and stuff too!
 
I need some chocolate. I always need chocolate after work (I've been working today), so I'm off to find some. Mmmmmmmm, chocolate!

I am still on crutches...The physiotherapist wouldn't take them away, but he did give me one with a hand rest the right way round for my left hand, so it doesn't hurt my hand/arm quite so much when I'm using them any more.

I met Rob's & Zosia's mummies! Yay!

I have to have keyhole surgery on my knee, to see if they can file down the ripped cartilage - doesn't sound much fun...But I guess if it stops it hurting, it's not too bad. I don't know how long it'll be til I get that though, and I could end up being on crutches til then...

Today is my day off work. Days off are good. I am working at the weekend though, but that does mean lots of money for me - always a good thing!

Well, I hate not having internet in my house. It means I have to come to campus to use it. It also means that it's really hard for me to see the computers, so I have to touchtype, and just hope that I'm not making too many spelling mistakes, as I can't see what's on the screen.

Hopefully, I will be getting rid of my crutches tomorrow. I have bruises on one arm from using them, & a big red mark on the other. They're also a pain when I need to carry anything.

I now have a social worker-y-type lady to help me with stuff to do with my eyes. She's nice. I now have orange stickers on things like the cooker & washing machine so that I know which settings are the ones that I use. She is, however, going to bring a white cane with her next time so I can have a look at it & decide whether I want one. I can't say that I'm to enthralled with the idea.

My pay has gone up. I'm now on £4.90 an hr as opposed to £4.55. Yay! I'm now also the supervisor of the casual staff! Yay again! Last week, I was doing a bit of supervisor type work, and asked some people to do something again, but they got cross, & told me that I wasn't worth as much as them, as I wasn't getting paid as much, and that I was only an undergrad...I'm now on the same money as them - they're all postgrads, and are inbetween 3 & 8 yrs older than me, and so were in the pay bracket above me, because they're older...But now, because I'm me(!) I get paid the same, & it's my job to tell them to do things again if they're not good enough...

I'm still finding Exeter kind of strange due to the general lack of people...But, I'm glad that I didn't go home for the summer. On Friday, I went to the Artful Dodger - it's nice, & cheap! On Sunday, Mark, Norris & I went to the Cowley - we wanted to do the pub quiz, but there wasn't one.

Does anyone know anything much about Canon Law? Do I have to pay off my student loan before I can make my vows as a Sister?

Please could you all pray...My great uncle hanged himself last week...I hadn't had any contact with him for 5 years - he's my father's uncle - but him & my great aunt sent me birthday cards until I was 16, so 5 years longer than any one else in my father's family, and because of that they've always been kind of special...So, prayers really would be appreciated...

Well, this is all a bit silly. I've been blogging, but it appears that my new blog entries aren't being published - at least I can't see them if they are?!

Well, it's a bit quiet in Exeter, but hey! Exeter's better than home. I saw a physiotherapist yesterday about my knee. As we really already knew, I do not have a pulled hamstring - I do have a torn ligament & possibly some cartilage damage, but my knee's too painful & inflamed for the physio to work out exactly what is wrong, so I have crutches to try to help things a bit. Hopefully I won't be on them for too long, as I have bruises on one hand and blisters on the other. I also have really bruised arms. Ah well, at least they're stopping my knee from being quite so painful!

Other than knees, work & dissertation, I haven't really been doing much. Going out for a drink for the 1st time since the end of term tonight!

Well, all is pretty quiet in Exeter. Most people have gone home, leaving just a few of the hardcore. It's very weird without Zosh & James. It will also be very weird not having Mass & CathSoc tonight.

This week, I have been cleaning. It's not too bad, but it is tiring. I have cleaned lots. Now, though, I'm not being sent off to help other cleaners, I'm being given other people to help me. It's cool. I have also been visiting a friend in hospital. She's as OK as you really can be when you need to be in hospital.

Other than that, I am still waiting for my pay cheque to clear, as I have no money until that happens - & the content of my cupboard is nothing worth writing about.

Other than work, I have been doing dissertation research. It's quite exciting really. I get to read cool books & speak to cool people.

Well, there's really not much more for me to say. What with no Mark at the moment either, I haven't been having many adventures...

Well, it's the last day of term, which means that pretty soon lots of cool people are disappearing.

I'm not disappearing, as I'm staying in Exeter all summer. Most of my time will be spent cleaning and doing dissertation research. At some point, I will be going home for a weekend or two, I'll probably also go to stay with my step dad in London, go to Wales for a weekend, & Barnstaple.

Today, work was easy. I did portering rather than cleaning, & it was a doss. Tomorrow won't be though. Tomorrow, we start spring cleaning after the students have left. Yay! No more grotty student kitchens to clean.

I have now added an infected finger and a potentially infected foot to my painful knee. My foot keeps weeping, but I have a plaster on it, & my finger appears to have a hole in it. The Theology Department Secretary told me to soak it in warm salt water, so I did. That got quite a lot of pus & blood out. I have a plaster on my finger too now.

I think that I'll go back to the Health Centre & see a nurse about my knee, my foot, and my finger next week...

THE STORY OF THE SUMMER BALL.
(Edited by me. Boring bits not included.)

I got ready for the ball at Zosh's last night. There is still no hot water in my house. At least not until tomorrow. By then, we will have been without hot water for seven days. I wore a pretty dress, and makeup and everything.

Just before 8:00 - after James had taken some photos, & we had shown Paul and Karen our outfits - we trooped off up to the Great Hall.

We started off by sitting in the Ram Gardens with 3 pints of Pimms and lomonade between us. By the time that we went for drinks, there were no jugs left, so we had to have 3 pint glasses instead.

Within 45 minutes Zosh had been asked on a date.

Later, we went inside, & listed to Collin Murray dj-ing. He was good. After that, it was time for Supergrass. They were great & we were right at the front. The disadvantage of this was that we did get pushed really hard. In it's turn, this locked my knee; so, Zosh and I had an expedition to the St John's Ambulance post. They were great. They took me to A&E in an ambulance. The ambulance was fun. I didn't really know whether to laugh or cry though. It was hilariously funny, but I was in so much pain!

At A&E, I got to have gas & air so that the doctor could manipulate my knee to make it move again. That hurt a lot. It moves now though; however, it is painful.

After A&E, Zosh & I went back to the ball. At 3:30am, we had full english breakfast - though not as good as James'!

For the Survivors' photo, Zosh, Jen, Tessa and I were right in the middle. It was great.

After the Ball, I went back to the Chaplaincy. Zosh went to bed, but I was going to sit downstairs with coffee & read a Terry Pratchett book...I managed 3 lines of it. The next thing I knew, it was 8:00, & I had to get up to go to work.

I went to the doctor today, like the hospital man told me to. I was told to make the doctor refer me to a physio. He wasn't keen on that. He also told me all I've done is pull my hamstring - I'm not too sure. I think it's my knee. Ah well...

Soon, I get my exam results. I'm very tired, & falling asleep. Possibly the best way for me right now...I'm very nervous...

Woohoo - this is my 100th post.

Today, it was Zosh's last Sunday Mass. I managed to hold back the tears til the Homily - though I had come close before that! From the Homily onwards, I cried a lot - especially when it came to doing the announcements at the end. If anybody understood what I said, it's a miracle!!!

Karen cooked pizzas today - thank you Karen!!! They were great - especially the "Karen Special"!

Zosh had bought presents for everyone - to say goodbye - they were great. I got a BIG Little Miss Sunshine book, & a silver cross - it's soo pretty.

After Mass, we had committee photos taken - I don't like photos, but as far as photo "sessions" go, this one wasn't bad.

My Grandparents are in Devon until Thursday. They're staying in Paignton though, so there is some distance between us. I love them a lot, but I'm quite independent, and my grandmother sometimes treats me like I'm still a little girl...I don't like that much. But, it's good that I get to see them. They're taking Zosh & me out for a meal tonight, which is nice.

For the past 4 days - 4 days!! - there has been NO HOT WATER in my house!! It's horrid. Now, when we hear screams of agony from the bathroom, we know it's because someone has decided that just maybe a cold shower is better than a cold strip wash. It's not. Cold strip washes aren't nice, but they're better than a cold shower. Yesterday, I went to the Chaplaincy for a shower - they have hot water.

Also at my house, we seem to have had no internet for 4 days. It's not good. It's just stopped working. So, I'm on campus using a computer that I can't really actually see, so I apologise for any typos that have resulted from that.

Yesterday, James, Mark, Amy, Zosh & I went on the rail ale trail. It was fun, though we didn't get to all of the pubs. I left a bit earlier than the rest of them though, as we were having a "goodbye" meal for my housemate, who is spending next year in Italy - I've been saying goodbye to so many people! However, I would have had to wait for an hour for the next train back from Crediton, so decided to walk in the general direction of Exeter until I found a bus stop with a bus timetable. As it was already 6pm, I decided that I'd do Scouts' Pace (20 paces of running, 20 of walking, repeat process...)...It took me a long time to find a bus stop with a bus timetable, so I ended up doing this for half an hour - in other words, all the way to Newton St Cyres. This morning, the muscles in my legs were a bit achy because of that!

Tomorrow, it's the summer ball. I'm v excited. Zosh looks lovely in her dress...I haven't tried my dress, shawl and shoes all on together yes, so I'm hoping they look OK.

I guess I'd better go home now, as I have to get ready to go out before my grandparents come & pick me up!

Well, it's aaaaaaages since I blogged.

On Saturday, we went for a retreat, but James & Zosh have already said lots about that, so I won't.

Mass on Sunday was good. But, I guess that I can't actually think of a BAD Mass. Music went well & everything.

It was v hard saying goodbye to Rachel...& to Georgia - but she'll be back in January, so it's not too bad...It's so hard saying goodbye to people...I'm dreading Zosia's last Mass...I'm going to cry...A lot!

Yesterday, I started my summer job - cleaning in Lafrowda/St Germans/Rowe House. It's not actually too bad - although I do have different coloured gloves, mops, buckets & cloths for different areas of the flats...It's quite funny really! We were also issued with a face mask - which the Chinese people I've been working with actually wear! - and goggles!!! It's so funny. Yesterday, 5 of us cleaned 2 kitchens. 1 of them was gross. What really got to me was scrubbing LUMPS of fat off the cooker hood. The other one wasn't too bad. Today the 5 of us were sent to do 3 kitchens, & to spring clean 2 bedrooms. While 4 of them did 2 kitchens between them, I spring cleaned both on-suite bedrooms, & we all cleaned the last kitchen.

Then, I went shopping with Zosh - it was great. We actually achieved our aim of buying shoes & shawls for the summer ball - it's so exciting! We also bought other stuff. I got a dress from H&M for the great price of £5!! It was a great day!

I'm v proud of my little - well, younger - brother. He's doing a diploma in Sports & Exercise Science at college. Last week, his tutor got his whole course group into a lecture room, & had a right go at them...saying how no-one had passed their assignment, and how they had all shown a complete lack of commitment and effort...By this point, my brother was getting fairly worried, as he knows my Mum & Grandma would not be happy if he didn't do well at college - he's not the most academic chap & hated school - & even though he's done really well so far, he was still scared...However, the tutor then went onto an "except"...No-one had passed the assignment, except for my brother(!!) who got a merit - so I'm well proud of him!

Everything's really quite exciting!

Well, yesterday we went to the zoo. As promised, no one stopped me from getting the 9:25 train. Rob & I thought that the others would text or phone when they got there, but they didn't, & apparently, they thought that we should have been meeting them. Ah well, never mind. A good day was had by all. Rob & I didn't go on the train, but then, we didn't want to. We thought we should leave that to all of the toddlers there yesterday.

We didn't get the "face-to-face" encounter with the cheetah either - but we did see a zoo keeper climb a tree. We were confused, so when he came down, we asked him why. Apparently, there's a pair of owls that have been there for 6 years, & they've just had chicks for the 1st time!!!

We saw baby meerkats too. They were sweet.

For the bbq, I made LOTS of salad. I was expecting HUNDREDS of people, but there really weren't that many, so there was too much salad. I did some cooking too. My bbq stayed really hot - thanks Paul...Paul's good at making bbqs really hot.

Today, I've caused a ruccus in Theology - I need an ethics thing so I can do my dissertation research. Thing is, the Ethics person's on sabbatical, and no-one ever needs an ethics thing to do a Theology dissertation. So, then I had to go to Classics, as there's now only a School Ethics person...Now, Classics only really deal with dead people & things like excavations, so they use very different ethics things to the kind of thing I need...It's all so confusing!

Well, now I've suitably confused myself & all of you, I'm going to stop.

Hmm... I think it's about time I blogged, since I haven't since before my last exam...

The exams are over!! Yay!!! I feel that I can write that today, since by 5:15, everyone will be finished, and there will be a nice glass of white wine waiting in the Ram for Zosh.

Since the end of my exams, I've been pretty much permanently hyperactive...But I think that's OK - I'm just so happy that they're done! I have gone back to trying to function normally - have even washed some clothes! I also have to tidy my room before Friday, as my best friend from home is coming down to visit!!! Yay - I'm so excited - Paul's great...He's even bringing his flute to play in Mass on Sunday!!

On Friday, after my exam, I spent almost 10 hours in the Ram. It was great. Today, I'm also going to the Ram...Then, we're going to a CathSoc meeting about the retreat that we're not going on - drunk!! Then, it's house party at James' house...Drinkage, drinkage, drinkage!

Tomorrow, we're going to the zoo - I'm so excited. 9:25 train sounds the best plan. I don't get hangovers & I'm great in the morning. No one shall stop ME getting the 9:25 train!! HAHAHAHA

Some point this week, Zosh & I are going shopping...& having a liquid lunch! Yay - more drinkage.

Well, weren't England silly on Sunday? Giving away 2 goals in the 90th minute?!! Ha! I'm glad I didn't watch it. Everyone went to the Chaplaincy to watch the 2nd half, but Rob & I went to James' house. Rob sat downstairs with Dan and watched the football, & I sat upstairs & played Tetris on Rob's computer. After that, Mark having given us the taste for madventure, Rob & I went madventuring. We walked up past Duryard, & then walked the same way as another madventure, but went up Bellevue Road...We walked & walked up the dark path of doom, & eventually came to the top of the hill...Then, there was a Private Road, so we turned around & walked all the way back down the hill...Then, we just walked to my house.

Yesterday, we went madventuring to Lafrowda ponds. It was nice, but I have lots of bites & I'm not as sensible as Ella - I don't use midgy repellent!

Today, I haven't really done much, apart from make my mother into an alien life form & throw her into orbit!!! I'll let you dwell on that one...

I'm not quite sure what you'd call this...I don't think it's really a poem. But anyway, I wrote it. Hope you like it!


The day has come
When my fate will be decided.
Today is the day that I will fight
The hardest battle.

The day has come
To test my strength and wisdom.
It is on this day that
I must win.

The day has come
And I must not let it defeat me.
Today, I must prepare myself well,
And battle hard.

The day has come
And I will fight a good fight.
But it is only time that will tell
Of my victory.

The day has come
And I will try to maintain courage.
I must not be a coward
And run.

The day has come
And I will walk into the exam room.
I must remember that this is not
The end of the world.

I still hold that female imagery of God is useful. God cannot be thoroughly portrayed in male terms.

Personification of Wisdom:
Proverbs 8:1-2:
"Does not wisdom call out? Does not understanding raise her voice? On the heights along the way, where the paths meet, she takes her stand..."

Proverbs 8:22-26 (& following that too):
"The LORD brought forth as the first of his works, before his deeds of old; I was appointed from eternity, from the beginning, before the world began. When there were no oceans, I was given birth, when there were no springs abounding with water; before the mountains were settled in place, before the hills, I was given birth, before he made the earth of its fields of any of the dust of the world."

These are both evident personifications of Wisdom/Sophia, & they both portray her as female. The Wisdom spoken about here is clearly not just an attribute of God; this Wisdom has been with God since before the earth was formed, and is a personification in its own right.

Wisdom 8:1:
"She reaches mightily from one end of the earth to the other, and she orders all things well."

This is pretty obviously another personification of Wisdom...

Wisdom 9:9-10:
"With thee is wisdom, who knows thy works and was present when thou didst make the world, and who understands what is pleasing in thy sight and what is right according to thy commandments. Send her forth from the holy heavens, and from the throne of thy glory send her, that she may be with me and toil, and that I may learn what is pleasing to thee."

More personification. Note that Wisdom is not just an attribute of God here, but dwells in heaven with God, and can be sent separately...Maybe this could be the Holy Spirit?

I do not think that it is right to say that God is to be spoken about as Father because that's how God is revealed to us - Alistar McGrath:
"To speak of God as Father is to say that the role of father in ancient Israel allows us insights into the nature of God, not that God is a male human being. Neither male nor female sexuality is to be attributed to God."

If male nor female sexuality are to be attributed to God, then surely, there is room for qualities from both sexes to be metaphorically applied when talking about the nature of God. In applying metaphors of both sexes, it embraces all of God's people, rather than serving to exclude them.

Throughout the Bible, the Holy Spirit is consistently female. This originates in the Old Testament writings.

Often, divine Wisdom is associated with the Holy Spirit. Wisdom is often spoken of as having been with God for all time (see above); Genesis 1:2:
"Now the earth was formless and empty, darkness was over the surface of the deep, and the Spirit of God was hovering over the waters."

This has strong resonances with Proverbs 8, where Wisdom is personified as having been with God in Creation, & is shown as a 'she'.

I still maintain that female imagery is valuable & applicable when talking about God. I also think that male imagery is good in talking about God too, so I don't want to dismiss that entirely - I just think that there are other ways too.

IS GOD JUST "OUR FATHER"?

I don't think so...I think that God is equally "OUR MOTHER".

I guess probably the best place to start would be in Scripture...

(Deutero- [there's 3 of them!]) Isaiah:
42:14 - "For a long time I have kept silent, I have been quiet and held myself back. But now, like a woman in childbirth, I cry out, I gasp and pant."
OK, so maybe here God is saying that God is LIKE a woman in childbirth, but to me, this is still an image that should not be forgotten. I also find it hard to see why God would choose to be like a woman in childbirth, with the crying, gasping & panting, unless God WAS like a woman in childbirth...(Sorry, don't know if I've explained that v well?!)

Then, of course, there's Wisdom 8-9, which is probably more Spirit orientated, but still speaks of God with the use of female imagery...(No, I'm not going to quote the full 2 chapters!)

My ideas aren't actually new...They're in fact pretty old...No, that doesn't mean 19th century. I'm talking 14th century, & Julian of Norwich. I know that not everyone particularly likes the stuff she said...I think some of it is pretty cool though:
"...what is it that Jesus our true Mother, does?...he carries us within himself in love, and he went into labour for the full time, suffering the most agonising pains and the sharpest birth pangs possible, util in the end he died...The human mother suckles her child with her own milk, and with the utmost tender kindness, our beloved Mother, Jesus, feeds us with himself.
(c.1390; Revelations of Divine Love ch.60)

I think it's also possible to perceive God as being transcendent of sex; perhaps it is possible that God so radically transcends human experience that no human language can speak totally accurately about God? (Not sure I totally agree, though I can kind of see the point.)
"It is neither patriarchal God nor matriarchal Goddess, neither the Masculine nor the Feminine, neither divine Fatherhood, nor complementary Motherhood that redeems and saves."
(Elisabeth Schussler Fiorenza; Jesus: Miriam's Child, Sophia's Prophet.)

Perhaps, envisioning God as in the image of one sex, rather than both, subordinates the other sex? Perhaps, entirely male-orientated speech about God does not allow the equal participation of women in divine spheres?

I think that it can even be said that the experience of labour and the delivery of a baby is a great metaphor for God's struggle to birth a new heaven and a new earth:
"The loud birthing cry evokes a God who is in hard labour, sweating, pushing with all her might to bring forth justice, the fruit of her love...And it is not over yet, only eschatologically will the delivery take place..."
(Elizabeth Johnson; She Who Is)

I don't think that any language about God can be fully sufficient to describe God, but I think that it is important that the language that we do use is inclusive.

God as Father is, I believe, an image that must remain central within my faith, but I think it is also an image that can be enriched by images such as that of Mother.

You can also think about it this way...Speaking of God as Father does not mean God has a male dimension, just as speaking of God as Mother does not mean God has a female dimension, just as speaking of God as a lion or eagle does not mean God has an animal dimension (I'm not altogther sure of what I think of this).

As women and men are created in the image of God, God can be spoken of as much in female metaphor as in male metaphor - both of them are equally valid.

I like prayer group. Prayer group's great. It made me feel better today...& I did some of what I call "prayer writing"...It's not exactly writing 'formal' prayers (ie. "Dear God, Please help..."), it's more like a kind of creative kind of writing that's also prayer...Anyway, I hadn't done much for aaaaaaaagggggggges, so it was kind of nice to do some.

I also read the whole of Plato's Symposium & started on Protagoras today. I think I'll be OK on the exam...At least I hope I will. I only have to answer one question on Philosophy - I can answer the others on Religion!!! Relief!!!!!

Tomorrow, I'm going to Torquay to visit a convent there. I'm excited!!!

Well, I didn't manage to blog yesterday, so have not managed to sustain my streak of blogging every day.

Have been revising hard, but am not looking forward to the Philosophy bit of my Greek Religion paper.

Not really much going on other than revision, though I am really looking forward to going to Torquay on Saturday.

I'm v tired today - have not had much sleep for a few nights.

Not a v long or exciting blog today, I'm afraid.

Hmmm...I think this may be another uncontentious blog. I'm not sure I have the energy for anything else.

I went to see Sr Anna (an Exeter nun) today. She's very nice. She says I can go back & meet the other Sisters there in July, when they'll be a bit more active...It's apparently all a bit quiet at the Convent at the moment.

Not all of the Sisters wear a habit, but they do all wear veils. They have different jobs now - they used to all be teachers, but now they're not. I would still be allowed to be a teacher though.

They seem to have a prayer life that would suit me - once I learnt how to get up at 5am!!!!!!! They pray together and on their own - which I like. They go to Mass pretty much every other day; they like Adoration; they also say the Rosary quite often.

I liked what Sr Anna said. I think I'll keep them in mind.

They're going to pray for me, & exams, which I think is v nice of them. I like prayers.